My good friend is going to be giving birth any day now and is planning a natural birth in a hospital. I've been thinking about her lots and can't wait to hear how everything goes. I thought I'd jot down a quick list of tips she can use as she goes into this transformative experience. In my experience, being in a hospital makes it more difficult to have a natural birth (but by no means impossible - I know many women who have labored with pitocin and have gone on to give birth without pain medication) simply because the option for medication is there...that is why I thought I'd give these tips.
1. Remember everything you've studied and learned. Remember to trust your body and the process. Remember that the pain will not last and that it will be over before you know it. While you're laboring and it is getting intense, tell yourself you can do anything for one minute. Count to 10 as you have a contraction and tell yourself you can get to 10. Remember to breathe...slow down your breathing to give your body oxygen - feel the energy rush back into you as you become grounded again.
2. When you feel like giving up or when you feel like the pain is so intense that you want to die (hah!), it'll be over right after. Everyone told me this and I had no comprehension of what they meant until I experienced it myself...I literally could not bear it any longer and in that moment, it was over. And then the joy was indescribable.
3. Make sure you have support - either your partner, mother, doula, friend, etc. Make sure they will stand by you and help you get through it while reminding you of the type of birth you desire. Make sure they'll stand up for you and be your voice with the nurses and doctor.
4. Enjoy the process. Let go of the fears and savor these moments. Think positive thoughts. I love this quote by Grantly Dick-Read, "Many women have described their experiences of childbirth as being associated with a spiritual uplifting, the power of which they have never previously been aware...To such a woman childbirth is a monument of joy within her memory. She turns to it in thought to seek again an ecstasy which passed too soon." Incredibly, after you give birth, you may feel too that it passed to soon. Savor it.
5. Move around! Change positions. Do not stay flat on your back in the bed. Be upright! It will move your baby down and your pain will be more manageable.
6. Overall, just be present. Embrace the laboring, the pushing, the delivering. Don't let yourself get down by thoughts of "How much longer is this going to take?" Those thoughts will come, but push them away and fill it with a positive thought instead. Tell yourself it's a beautiful day for your baby's birth and practice patience.
Here's all of the warm wishes and luck in the world to my beautiful friend!
Thanks so much! That is great advice! It means a lot!!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Kami! After having a natural/unmedicated birth in the hospital, I would say #3 is HUGE!!! I was busy laboring when people came in to talk and see how things were, that is where my husband was a life saver. He kept everyone away and did all the talking so that I could stay "in my zone". I didn't really need him to talk to me or touch me, I need him to keep everyone else away :)
ReplyDeleteI REALLY want to have a natural birth at the hospital too- luckily my dr. is pretty hippy and relaxed and she's all about doing what i want to do. are there more sights you could direct me to? I LOVE these tips!!! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteMy advise:
ReplyDelete1) Stay home as long as possible. Wait until you feel like you REALLY NEED to be at the hospital.
2) Give in. Give in to the labor, give in to the pain. Think about relaxing and opening up. Give in to what your body is asking of you. Let go of your thinking brain and embrace the animal brain. I found myself in labor thinking "stay upright, move around", etc and I was tensing up and not coping well. When I realized MY body wanted me to lay down in bed on my left side, I gave in, I focused on relaxing, things got SO much easier.
3) Think positive - "open" is a more positive thought than "I can't do this" or "no".
4) Remind your support person ahead of time to offer you water in a straw bottle. I got really dehydrated (and thus I think my pain was worse) because I forgot to remind my support person of this ahead of time (to be fair, she wasn't supposed to BE my support person!).
5) Try and feel connected to all the laboring mamas throughout the world and throughout time. You are not alone. You are SO not alone.
6) Last one - trust. Trust your body, trust your instincts. If your instincts say everything's ok, go with that. If your instincts pushing you one way or another, follow that. Laboring mamas have special instincts that guide them.
I just found your blog! It's very inspiring and wonderful to have this info. I was able to have a natural child birth in the hospital and the biggest thing that helped me was staying at home as long as possible. That was all because of my husband who kept telling me it was too soon to go to the hospital whenever I told him it was time....he knew what to watch for during my labor process. After I checked into the hospital my baby was born 1 hour later!
ReplyDeletethanks for the post kami! can't wait to be doing this in the next 8 days (hopefully!)
ReplyDeleteI delivered my last baby at home and would do it again in a heartbeat. It was one of the best experiences of my life!
ReplyDelete